My passport gender marker is an X

everytime it is checked I hold 

my breath ballooned with bill 

numbers seared into the mind of 

non-binary eyes bleeding ink reading 

how my existence has been deemed 

illegal again and again and again I find

the breath still has not left my lungs

until I am deemed with a nod that this 

body will not be brutalized (today) I am

carrying it in my phone case as the vibration

in my nerves walks itself out the door

and I wait for the shoe to drop